Beautiful Savior

Today in sacrament meeting, four boys in my ward sang "Beautiful Savior". It was honestly one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard. First off that song is gorgeous and second of all they had amazing voices. It was seriously wonderful.

Beautiful Savior

Fair is the sunshine, fairer the moonlight

And all the stars in heav'n above.

Jesus shines brighter, Jesus shines purer,

And brings to all the world his love.

Fair are the meadows, fairer the woodlands

Robed in the flowers of blooming spring.

Jesus is fairer, Jesus is purer,

He makes the sorrowing spirit sing.

Beautiful Savior! Lord of the nations

Son of God and Son of Man

Thee I honor, praise, and give glory.

Give glory evermore.

Sky

The sky and I have something in common.

I am usually a very emotional person i.e., I cry a lot. Not always because I am sad, but when I am happy too. But for the past two months or so, I haven't gotten emotional about anything. I haven't cried. There were of course the occasional teary eyes, either from being happy or sad, but despite all the crappy stuff that has happened the past few weeks, I haven't really broken down and sobbed. Some may think this is a good thing, but for me, crying is a release, cathartic even. Crying frees all the pent up negative emotion that exists inside the body. I always feel better after a good cry. It is for this reason that I was concerned about my lack of tears/emotion.

Much like my lack of tears, the weather in Provo the past few weeks has been similarly frustrating. Everyday, around two or three in the afternoon, the clouds roll in and sprinkle a few raindrops for maybe 30 minutes at the longest. After a few weeks of this taunting behavior, I found myself wishing for the clouds to just open up and pour. Just get it over with, stop with the lame random raindrops. Well today that finally happened. Right on schedule, the dark clouds rolled in at around 3, but this time, they actually opened up and poured. Likewise, this morning, right on schedule, tears filled my eyes as more worries entered into my brain. But this time, the tears actually spilled out--and they kept spilling out. Then came the deep sobs. All the stress and negative emotion from the past few months was finally coming out!

It felt so good.

Not only because I was releasing all that negative energy, but also because I found out that I can still cry! I had started to imagine myself like Cameron Diaz on The Holiday-- a thirty-something year old who hadn't cried since she was a kid.

Crying is good for you. You should never hold it back (unless you are in a situation where it would be socially awkward to start crying e.g. in the grocery store, walking on campus, at a dance party etc.). Just let it go. I promise you will feel better afterward. There is always a rainbow after the rain.

Kate Voegele

I try not to compare my life to music and movies, but sometimes a song rolls around that really speaks to me and describes exactly what I am feeling in words that I couldn't have come up with on my own. Here is a perfect example:

Sweet Silver Lining by Kate Voegele

Im going home,
down-hearted and hoping Im close,
to some new beginning.
I know,
theres a reason for everything that comes and goes.

Chorus:
So many people are looking to me to be strong and to fight
but Im just surviving.
And I may be weak but Im never defeated
and Ill keep believing
in clouds with that sweet silver lining.

Verse 2:
Most days I try
my best to put on a brave face
but inside my bones are cold and my heart breaks
but all the while, somethings keeping me safe and alive

Chorus:
So many people are looking to me to be strong and to fight
but Im just surviving.
And I may be weak but Im never defeated
and Ill keep believing
in clouds with that sweet silver lining.

Bridge:
I wont give up like this,
I will be given strength,
Now that Ive found it,
Oh nothing can take that away

Chorus:
So many people are looking to me to be strong and to fight
but Im just surviving.
And I may be weak but Im never defeated
and Ill keep believing
in clouds with that sweet silver lining

Love Love Love

WOW

Words cannot describe the joy I am feeling right now. My mom just called to tell me about the City Council meeting tonight at home. She said at least 300 people came to the meeting to support my Dad. A lot of them were from my Stake but a lot were just random citizens of the city who came to show their love and support for him. Person after person got up and talked about how my Dad was the only one who ever returned the citizens calls and how he was the only one out of the whole council who ever acted like they cared. My Dad has such a great love for the city and is so wonderful to see how much it has paid off. My uncle even drove down from Pasadena just to come and support him. 

Our family and friends have been SO incredible. I can't even begin to talk about how grateful I am. Everyone has been so thoughtful and so amazing. I have truly felt everyone's prayers on our behalf. This has been such a testimony builder to me on how we are truly here to be instruments in the Lord's hands and to help our fellow men. This has also increased my love for people and especially people from my home town and for my family.

I just watched a streaming video of my Dad's closing statement to wrap up the meeting. Wow. It is so interesting because he quoted Jimmy Stewart in It's a Wonderful Life where he says that a man who has friends is never a failure and is the riche

st man in town ( or something like that). It is interesting because I was just thinking about that movie today and my facebook status for a week has been "Life is Wonderful" (Thanks to a good friend who recommended that song to me :) My Dad is amazing. 

See , I told you my posts wouldn't be depressing anymore :)

                                                                   It's A Wonderful Life

It's not always sunny...

The past two days have been an example of how life can just be really gloomy. Without going into a huge speal with all the juciy details, I will just say enough to get it out of my brain so I don't explode into an ocean of tears. 

Basically, politics suck. Corruption permeates everywhere, even places you thought were safe. Unfortunately this corruption hurts everyone involved, including my father. He got caught up in a huge mess that is affecting the future of his political career and the essentially the future of our family. People he thought he could trust have turned their backs on him and even spoken publicly against him. An honest man who loves to serve his people has been made to look like a crook. This has resulted in a lawsuit and being fired from his job. People are calling for his resignation from the city council and we can only guess how this will affect his campaign for state assembly. Yet despite all this, my father still remains optimistic. He still has faith in humanity which is more than I can say for myself right now.

Our family and friends have been so supportive. There has been an outpouring of love and kindness which has been overwhelmingly wonderful. Our faith is strong, which is all you have left when everything else falls apart.  Trials strengthen us and my dad is confident that he will come out of this stronger than ever.  

In the end, this has just reaffirmed to me that life may not always be sunny, but it is never impossible to find sunshine. Prayer, beautiful friends,running and music are just a few of the rays of sunshine that have helped me get through the past few days. Thanks, you know who you are. :)

p.s. I promise my posts wont be depressing anymore :)

LOVE LOVE LOVE polyvore.com