Just sayin....

I have come to the realization lately that I think I should have been born on a farm or in the country. This might have something to do with the fact that I have lived in Idaho and Utah for the past (almost) six years of my life. I grew up in a very urban area- the houses on either side of mine were probably only 15 feet away.

Exhibit A:

Don't get me wrong, I love Southern California and I LOVE where I grew up, but sometimes I just really wish I lived in the middle of nowhere.

Exhibit B:

This picture makes me feel a variety of different feelings:

1. It makes me really happy
2. It brings out a deep sense of longing
3. It makes me jealous of whoever's farm that is
4. and it makes me want to marry a rancher or a farmer so I can live somewhere like that ( Ok, I know it is silly, but at least I know that it is silly, right?!)

Ok though, in all seriousness, I have really come to love and value the beauty of the earth. I am having a hard time coming up with a way to accurately describe my feelings on this subject..... so I will spare you from the rambling that comes from not knowing what I am trying to say.....There is actually a Dixie Chicks song that kind of describes what I am trying to say so here are a few lines from that song:

I wanna touch the earth
I wanna break it in my hands
I wanna grow something wild and unruly

I wanna sleep on the hard ground
In the comfort of your arms
On a pillow of bluebonnets
In a blanket made of stars

I wanna walk and not run
I wanna skip and not fall
I wanna look at the horizon
And not see a building standing tall

I wanna be the only one
For miles and miles
Except for maybe you
And your simple smile

FIN

It's Been Awhile.....

Well, school has been going for about a month now and I have managed not to go too crazy yet. The biggest thing that has changed in the last month is that I changed my emphasis in the MPA program to Nonprofit Management. So this was kind of a surprising decision (even for me) because I have always wanted to do local government- as in I decided to go to grad school so I could do local government. But when school started, I just was not happy with my classes and I just didn't feel good about where I was going. (Those that know me really well know that I have to feel good and be happy with what I am doing or I wont be able to do it) So I started thinking about nonprofit and maybe switching my emphasis but I kept thinking "No, it's too late, you would be way too behind." or "Hey, wait! You have always loved local government, you can't just switch up the whole course of your career with only eight months till graduation!"

So it was the last day to add or drop classes and I got an email from Catherine (the assistant director of the program) asking if anyone wanted to switch into the nonprofit classes because it was the last day and they needed more people. So with about 2 hours to think about it and meet with Catherine, I took a few minutes and tried to think about it rationally ( I am kind of known to make major decisions without thinking them through all of the way) but then I realized that I don't really have time to think about it rationally and to do all the things you are supposed to do when making a huge decision (e.g. pro/con lists) so I decided to resort to my favorite way of making decisions- How does it make me feel? Switching my emphasis to nonprofit felt right and I knew I would be very happy doing it. So I did. And it worked out beautifully. The classes I had to add fit perfectly into my schedule and I didn't have to change my work schedule at all or anything! A fellow student still had the books so I could just buy them from him and Dr. Witesman was so excited and very willing to work with me on getting me caught up. The biggest way I know that it was the right decision is the fact that I actually enjoy reading my textbooks! I don't fall asleep!

This experience has taught me a few things, but the biggest thing is that you just need to do what makes you happy. We are blessed with the Spirit of discernment and that means we should be able to rely on the way we feel about things to help us in the decisions we make. If we feel uneasy about something, we shouldn't do it. If we don't feel at peace about something, it may not be the best decision.

On a lighter less serious note, I LOVE FOOTBALL!!!! I have been having so much fun going to the games with my friends, it has been a blast! ( I am sure having 40 yard line, front row seats helps a little :)

Also, despite the fact that I miss Summer desperately, the Fall IS beautiful!! Just wish it didn't get so cold so fast!

Sorry for the long, rambling post- I will try to stay more updated :)

Summer all the time!

So school starts like...tomorrow. In less than 12 hrs I will be in class. I have had such a wonderful summer, it is really hard to think about going back to school. But I have decided that I will just pretend it is still summer, even when it's not. Let me explain: This summer was very relaxing for me. I did everything that I wanted to do and more. I had a very laid back, no worries attitude. So I have decided I will just keep that attitude, even when things are going crazy. Also, I will not think about how great summer was and complain about the fact that it is not summer anymore. So even when my skin starts turning white again from the lack of sun, I will just pretend I am tan. I will act like it is still summer.

Besides, I really do LOVE the Fall.


FOOTBALLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tati

This is Tati.

Tati is my roommate. Not only is Tati my roommate, she is also one of the best examples to me about how to be a good person. Why, you ask? Let me just give you a few reasons:

Tati is strong. She puts up with a lot; and she does it without complaining.

Tati is patient. Tati teaches severely handicapped children. How she is able to be patient and kind with them is beyond my comprehension, yet she does it- every single day. Not only does she do it, but she loves it.

Tati sees the beauty in all people. As I just mentioned, Tati teaches handicapped children. The other day I was asking her about her class and she excitedly told me all about them and how wonderful they are. She told me about a little girl and she described her as beautiful. Tati has the rare ability to see beauty in people that most other people cannot see.

Tati is self-sacrificing. She will do anything for anyone. You couldn't find a better friend to have.

Tati is beautiful

Tati loves her family more than anyone I have ever met.

Tati is a GREAT swimmer :)

Those are just a few of the reason's why I think Tati is wonderful. I am so so SO blessed to have her in my life.

Grace

–noun
1. elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action.
2. a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment.
3. favor or good will.

Our (Tati and I) keyword for this coming semester is grace. This word originally came into my mind when I was imagining myself running around like a mad woman or a chicken with it's head cut off this next semester when I am working 20 hrs. a week and in my second year of grad school. Sometimes I get stressed and act kinda silly (e.g. grunting and sighing a lot, even making frustrated screaming noises). I decided that I don't want to be like that. No matter how crazy crazy things get, I want to maintain composure. I want to be graceful. I want to do everything gracefully, and with style. No screaming and pulling my hair out, just calm deep breaths and smiles :)

I was telling my best friend about our keyword and it occurred to me that the word grace is also in my all time favorite scripture. 2 Nephi 25:23 : "For we labor diligently to write, to persuade our children, and also our brethren, to believe in Christ, and to be reconciled to God; for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do." I love love LOVE this scripture because it teaches me that if I do everything that I possibly can and have faith the Atonement will make up the rest and everything will be OK!!

GRACE

For the Beauty of the Earth

Today was a beautiful, wonderful day. When I woke up this morning, I have to admit, I didn't have very high hopes (it was cloudy and rainy- in August ). But this afternoon the sun came out and it all turned around. I rode my bike down the Provo River Trail to the very end by the lake. If you keep going past the lake recreation area, the trail continues along the edge of the lake and ends abruptly at the edge of the water. There is only one other time that I can think of when pure natural beauty has literally taken my breath away. I don't know exactly what made it so beautiful to me-it could have been the perfect blue sky with just enough clouds to make it look like a painting. Or maybe it was the trees slightly blowing in the breeze which reminded me so much of my grandparent's house in Fallbrook. Or it also could have been the gorgeous mountains in the distance and the horses grazing in the field. I think what really made it so beautiful is how close I felt to Heavenly Father at that moment. I could feel His love for me, and for all of His children, so strongly. Everything seemed so simple. I sat there on the pavement for about thirty minutes and just thought about life. It was pretty cliche, but I honestly cannot imagine a more perfect place to sit and think. Before I got back on my bike, I sat there and tried to etch everything about that spot onto my brain so that I could remember it every time I get stressed or sad or lonely. I felt warm, and perfectly at peace. Nothing could touch me there. One of my favorite hymns came to mind as I was sitting there- For the Beauty of the Earth.

For the beauty of the earth,

For the beauty of the skies,

For the love which from our birth

Over and around us lies,

Lord of all, to thee we raise

This our grateful hymn of praise.

For the beauty of each hour

Of the day and of the night,

Hill and vale, and tree and flower,

Sun and moon and stars of light,

Lord of all, to thee we raise

This our grateful hymn of praise.

For the joy of human love,

Brother, sister, parent, child,

Friends on earth, and friends above,

Pleasures pure and undefiled,

Lord of all, to thee we raise

This our grateful hymn of praise.

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blog bloggy bloggity blog

So I really need to write more.

It always feels so good when I am finished with a really solid blog post. So right now I am listening to the We Shot the Moon album entitled "Fear and Love". I am addicted for sure. This album really reminds me of one of my all time favorite bands, MXPX. I love love love it!

Just a quick note about having faith and not freaking out. I have learned in the past few months that things really never go exactly how you want them to. Mishaps are a part of everyday life. See the old me would literally freak out if something didn't go as planned. The new me (and I can't even put my finger on exactly when it happened) kind of just lets it go. Its like a drop of water hitting me, it pauses for a second and then it just rolls right off my shoulder. Don't get me wrong, I still get slightly upset when things don't go the way I planned, but it is just so refreshing to just let it go. I was talking about this with one of my friends and I was saying that I was worried that I couldn't feel anything anymore, that the fact that I wasn't freaking out was kind of freaking me out. She said something that has been stuck with me for a few weeks now. She said that she wished that her faith was that strong. That maybe the fact that I don't freak out anymore is a sign that my faith is getting stronger and that I know that everything will be ok.

Wow. That really hit me because I DO KNOW, without any doubt, that everything will be ok. Things are NEVER as bad as they seem. I will be ok. You will be ok. We will all be ok, if we just keep our faith strong and keep doing the things we are supposed to.

So......When your internship falls through and you have to stay in Provo all summer, it will be ok! When the cake your made for your roommate's birthday is lopsided, it will be ok because you can just cover it up with chocolate cinnamon bears!

LIFE IS WONDERFUL!!!!!

So in the words of We Shot the Moon: "I'm ready for fear and love, and everything between"

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